Thursday, September 22, 2011

Awful Cross the Road Jokes with Video

Awful Cross the Road Jokes with Video

Chicken about to cross the road

Why did the pigs cross the road with their laundry?
They wanted to do their hogwash.

Did you hear about the two kangaroos
 who crossed the road?
They jumped into each other's pouches
 and were never seen again.

Why did the one-handed gorilla cross the road?
To get to the second-hand shop.

Why did the frogs cross the road?
To get a croak-a-cola.

Why did the rabbit cross the road?
To get to the hopping mall.

Why did the wasp cross the road?
It needed to go to the waspital.
Why did this man cross the road ?!
Take a deep breath cos he did it twice
How do you keep a dog from crossing the road?
You put him in a barking lot.

What do you call a chicken that crosses the road without looking both ways?

Why did the hen go halfway across the road and stop?
She wanted to lay it on the line.

Why did the sheep cross the road?
He needed to go to the baa baa shop.

Why did the otter cross the road?
To get to the otter side.

Where do animals go when they lose their tails?
They cross the road to the retail shop.

Cute - Why did the chicken cross the road ?
Why did the duck cross the road?
Because the chicken retired and moved to Florida.

Why did the chicken cross the muddy road and not come back?
Because he didn't want to be a dirty double-crosser.

Why did the turkey cross the road?
It was the chicken's day off.

Why did the chicken cross the road by the playground?
To get to the other slide.

Why did the goose cross the road?
Because the light was green.

Why did the elephant cross the road?
To pick up the squashed chicken.

Did you hear the story about the peacock who crossed the road?
It is really a colourful tail.....
How did a chicken cross the road again ?
Why did the chewing gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chickens foot !

Got another awful cross the road joke ?
send it in below
Cross the Road Jokes lines sent in by you

Whay did the beaver cross the road?
Because he didn't give a dam!

why did the chicken cross the Road? Tae go tae the shop.
Hink that's funny? He didn't, the shop wiz shut!

why did i cross the road?
to get away from these lame crossing the road jokes! 

Credits : Photo © Copyright Ashley Dace and licensed for reuse under this Creative Commons Licence.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Water Melon - How to Carve - Video

How to carve a water melon ? Well you can carve it into halves, then quarters and just gorge on it's deliciousness.

Or you carve a melon this way as in a piece of artwork, just admire its beauty and not eat it at all.

Watermelon carving from Vid Nikolic on Vimeo.

Watermelon By Marian Keyes - "I would seriously recomend this book for anyone wanting a night in and a laugh! Do not go out in public and read this book, its too embarrassing when you laugh out loud! " A highly recommended book from

Quote on Encouragement

"One of the most beautiful gifts in the world is the gift of encouragement. When someone encourages you, that person helps you over a threshold you might otherwise never have crossed on your own."
John O'Donohue

Where to find some good quotes

Need a quote for a speech, a wedding, for work, for a study or dissertation. Here are some websites with lots of quotes.